72 Secrets to Happiness
Secret 12 Love


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You cannot love anyone and no one can love you if you do not first love yourself.  Another way of stating this is that if you do not possess the ability to love then you cannot feel love from others.

You might say, "Well my mother loved me so I must know love and I must love myself from what you just told me above."  This is not the type of love that this secret is talking about.  Here is a test.  Do you love or hate your enemies.  Not fair you say!  How can you love your enemies?

It is a bit of a trick question.  It should say do you dislike your enemy's actions toward you or do you hate the human being taking those actions?  You may very well think these two things are the same.  If you do then you are doomed to unhappiness.

If you hate the person it is like hating a tree or a rock.   In fact you just do not like the person's thought or actions because those thoughts are causing harm to yourself and others.  It is their mental thoughts which you have a problem with.

You should know by now if you are still reading this secret that two bad things do not make one right.  Love on the other hand can completely transform a bad though into a good thought and has great power in overcoming evil.  To love your enemy is to disarm his hatred for you.  How can you hate someone who truly and honestly cares and loves you?

Ok, well the point is this, no one is asking you to find all your enemies and start loving them.  The practical application here is that the more you care about and love everyone you encounter the more you will disarm their ill feelings toward you and love will come your way.

If you are dating then you should know that unless you make your date feel comfortable things will most likely not go so well.  In a marriage you cannot expect to receive love unless you express love, it is just the way it works.  So coming full circle, you must love yourself so that you can love others.

This does not mean that you are a narcissist or stuck up, it means that you realize that you are human and not perfect and as long as you trying your best, then you will feel happy knowing that you are on the right path and growing.  You can be assured that with enough effort you too can not only love yourself but others.  And when that happens they will love you back and that my friends will give you more happiness than you have ever imagined possible.
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